Anxiety, low mood and loneliness in pregnancy: where to get support

Pregnancy isn’t always the glowing time people expect. Low mood, worry and loneliness are common, and there is support. This article covers the signs to look for and where to turn.

What to look out for

The NHS lists these as possible signs of depression in pregnancy:

feeling sad, low or tearful a lot of the time
being irritable or quick to anger
withdrawing from people and daily life
changes in appetite
negative thoughts, including fear of not being able to care for your baby
guilt, hopelessness or self-blame
trouble concentrating or making decisions

The NHS says if you often feel low and hopeless and no longer enjoy the things you used to, talk to your midwife or GP. Stress, anxiety or low mood that affects your daily life is also on the NHS list of symptoms to get help for.

Who can help

Your midwife or GP. Tell them as soon as you can. The NHS says a GP may recommend a self-help course or refer you for NHS talking therapies. Waits can be several weeks.
PANDAS Foundation. Free helpline on 0808 1961 776, for people struggling during or after pregnancy, and for people worried about someone else. Check the PANDAS site for current opening hours.
Samaritans. Call 116 123 (free, 24 hours).
Maternal Mental Health Alliance. Its support page lists charities and a map of local perinatal mental health services (England only).

If you need help right now

If you are in crisis, despairing or having suicidal thoughts, talk to a healthcare professional straight away. In England, you can call NHS 111 and choose option 2 for mental health crisis support. In Wales, ask NHS 111 Wales about urgent mental health support (option 2). In Scotland, call NHS 24 on 111, or Breathing Space on 0800 83 85 87 (check hours). In Northern Ireland, call Lifeline on 0808 808 8000, free and open 24 hours. You can also go to A&E or call Samaritans on 116 123 (free, 24 hours) from anywhere in the UK. Call 999 if you think you or someone else might be harmed.

The NHS also says to contact a GP immediately if you start hearing or seeing things that aren’t real, or develop strong beliefs that other people don’t share. If you can’t reach a GP, call NHS 111 or go to A&E.

Feeling lonely

Loneliness is common, especially if friends aren’t pregnant or you’ve moved. It’s worth saying out loud to your midwife. For more, see what mums asked about loneliness and low mood in pregnancy.

Questions people ask

Is it normal to feel anxious about everything?

Worry is common in pregnancy. Tommy’s suggests speaking to your midwife or GP if you’ve felt anxious most of the time for more than 2 weeks, if you think you’ve had a panic attack, if unwanted thoughts keep returning, or if you’ve had anxiety before. Talking to someone you trust, gentle activity and breathing exercises can help.

Can I refer myself for talking therapy?

In England you can refer yourself to NHS Talking Therapies without seeing a GP (you need to be registered with a GP and aged 18 or over, or 16 in some areas). You can also ask your midwife or GP. In Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland, ask your GP, midwife or health visitor how to get talking therapy locally.

Will talking about it affect how my care goes?

The NHS says to speak to a midwife or GP as soon as possible if you think you might have antenatal depression, so they can arrange support.